What's love like?

To my definition, love as first sight is a definite infatuation.
kalo emang terjadi, pasti tertarik karena fisik semata,
dan most likely jadi hambar ketika hubungan berlanjut lebih lama.
this thing was so unlikely to ever happened to me, makanya gue gak percaya.
jiyeeeh, buruk rupa cermin dibelah gyahahaha...

Makanya buat gue, love at first sight itu pasti ilusi semata, fatamorgana,
dan namanya bukan love.
Namanya like.
Suka, bukan cinta.
Bukannya salah, biasanya emang ada ketertarikan dulu yah sebelum cinta.
Kecuali ikut program ta'aruf sama ibu udztajah.
oke i dont know how to spell this.

Tapi kalo di film komedi romatis ada yang jatcin-pad-pand-pert,
Translation: jatuh cinta pada pandangan pertama - okek?!
Pasti hati gue akan mencibir dengan bilang:
alaaah tepuuu ah...
Paling infatuation, sebentar juga akan ilang ketika tau sifat sifat jeleknya.
and when you two settle down, you'll feel monotonic and bored.
padahal itu semua dalam pilem hahaha... aku memang suka delusional, hahaha.

Di serial sex and the city, yang suka gue tongkrongin rerunnya tiap subuh,
i was pretty excited to know that mr big aka john james preston,
appeared in the very early episodes.
Terus inget film layar lebarnya nya, yang mana carrie eventually married to big.

nah kalo kejadian sama manusia nyata ya... misalnya ini cerita beneran gitu...
was she experieced love at first sight?
did she know from the start that he IS the LOVE of her life.
and when she hold on to him, after uncountable series of broken heart,
did she even know that she'll end up with him eventually?

tapi kalo nonton serial mah enak ya neik...
mentok metok kalo penasaran, tunggu aja waktu tayangnya abis,
beli deh dvd nya, langsung puter yang episod final.
there you go, ketauan deh ahirnya gimana.
on carrie, it was a happy ending,
terus kalo idup di dunia nyata yang fana ini gimana dong?
pan kagak ada dvdnya bowww, ya abeees, menurut nganaaa???

it's been a while since i started to rethink about this.
how do we know if someone's THE one.
was it love or was it like?
i mean, what's love like?

The easiest was of course putting myself on the stage.
did i experience jatcinpadpandpert?
on shoes? yes. numbers of times.
on human, nop.

LIKE at the first sight? yes. ouuu yeah... yes, definitely.
too many yes' to be honest.
tetep, first sight attraction is mainly physical dan pekat banget didorong sama hawa conquering,
veni vidi vici lah pokoknya hahaha, gahar yaaa!!!
anisa kali ah, gahar.
sampe gue tu berasa ada keturunan julius caesar, loh.
padahal ngga ada, turunan julius sitanggang apalagi.

well eniveyyy...
on BEE or before erw era, this attitude deceived my heart so many times.
aku bak laron pada lampu teplok, mudah terpikat.
pinter dikit, nyangkut. gayanya oke, nyangkut.
wangi, nyangkut. becandaan bisa nyambung, nyangkut.
setelah nyangkut, i easily throw statements of love,
make myself believe that i DO in love with this guy,
without even sure about my true feeling.
neglect the fact that he might be one bad influence for me.

because let's admit it...
when you're into someone, the world seems to be a happier place, yes?
waking up every morning is an excitement, pingin ketemuuu terus rasanya.
pas ketemu, deg deg serrr, duhhh... not plaaay bukan main gembiranya.
ngeliat bahunya dari belakang aja udah hepi, belom lagi kalo ngobrol ngobrol.
flirting dan tarik ulur was indeed so fun, so exciting, and additive.
gue gak heran kalo banyak orang udah komit menikah tapi masi plirak plirik.
it's a serious action of adrenalin pumping!
banyak loh orang yang gak sadar bahwa dirinya adalah actually an adrenalin junkie.

terus gimana dong biar gak ketipu sama adrenalin,
gimana dong bedain like and love?

gaktau di orang lain ya, to me,
love feels like home.
ketika ada orang yang bisa bikin kita nyaman banget,
yang bisa bikin gue ceria lagi, sejelek apapun hal yang gue hadapin,
atau gue merasa bisa cerita tentang apapun, even the embarrassing things to him,
and at the end of the day, baru lengkap rasanya kalo gue cerita ke dia,
ada kejadian apa aja hari ini.

i just know that he might be the one.
gak tau gimana proses teknisnya, i-just-felt-it.
even ketika lagi diem di restoran, duduk hadap hadapan nunggu makanan,
pergi bareng keluar dan gue gak dandan, dan tanpa pake deodorannyaman.
like that old daster yang bahannya udah bluwek banget tapi adem.
you don't care how it looks.

ketertarikan pada pandangan pertama, itu ada.
tapi cinta, buat gue justru datengnya setelah spending times beberapa waktu.
setelah tahu jelek jeleknya dia.
knowing that you're really okay with those habits,
and voila. that is probably love.

But how do we know if the feeling's mutual?
To me, a man is actually an easy being.
a yes means yes. and a no means no.
kalo dia emang tertarik, he'll come for us.
he'll have some effort and he'll make make things happen.
kalo engga? ya engga. udah, simpel aja.
tapi ada juga kok tipe laki yang kurang tegas,
mau mau-engga, tapi engga engga-mau.
Bikin geregetannn, sebenernya mau gaksi sama gue?!

that's when the timing comes around.
pengennya sih bilang: dude, i can't wait forever. you and me, is it a yes or a no?
ya jeung yaaa...
kalo bisa gitu, ya bagus.
awalnya gue juga gak berani untuk nanya yes or no dengan gamblang gitu,
apalagi perempuan timur kan nature nya tu nggak hunting ya.
serasa serasa ngga enak kalo sampe menyatakan perasaan duluan gitu.
ya klo gini sih,
sebenernya balik lagi ke pribadi masing masing, sekuat apa nahan rasa penasaran?
i was obviously ngga tahan sebenernya hahaha... aku anaknya gak sabarannn.

tapi kalo pingin nunggu aja, personally gue akan tunggu 3 bulan.
once i waited for this particular guy, for almost a year, only to find out that it's a no.
males kan?
tau gituuu, 3 bulan ngga nembak, tinggalin aje. huuu...
penyesalan yang datang belakangan, ehm kalo duluan namanya pendaftaran, mbak.

after that session of "menunggu dia menyatakan-tapi-bertepuk sebelah kaki",
i learnt my lesson.
Dalam kesempatan lain, dengan orang yang berbeda,
setelah 3 bulan deket, intens, pergi berduaan, ini dan itu,
gue milih untuk menyatakan aja di depan idungnya.
walopun it turns out be a no JUGAK, tapi gue gak nyesel samasekali.
lega malahan!!!
i left easily, no hard feeling, dan malah sampe sekarang kita tetep temenan baik.
i moved on to the next one, siap ketemu siapa lagi yang akan Allah pertemukan,
sambil terus berdoa, semoga the next one will be THE one.
Etapi ksian juga ya gue, ditolak muluk uhuuu...

episod episod tadi, menyimpan pesan.
It was one of the many misleading directions done by my heart.
Waktu itu otak mungkin gue sebenernya cuma LIKE,
tapi hati gue ngaku ngakuin sebagai LOVE.
ditambah keinginan untuk segera kawin ya bow hahaha.
ahirnya tendensinya adalah menjadi tambeng,
gampang maklum sama hal hal yang sebenernya bertentangan dengan pribadi gue.
yang sebenernya bikin gue ilfil, atau gak sreg, tapi gak berani gue akuin ke diri gue sendiri,
karena hati gue udah bilang this is LOVE.

Udah gitu konyolnya, walopun hati gue kenceng kenceng bilang gitu,
hati dia?
ternyata kagak tuh cyiiin... hahaha, sedih ya.

So i learn to be wiser on defining LIKE and LOVE.
being truth to my heart if it really IS love, or just like and lust.
dan ternyata acara being true to my heart ini susah,
ngga segampil nyanyi bareng stevie wonder & 98 degrees.
karena abis jujur jujuran sama diri sendiri, comes the harder part.
kalo kata candi staton yang lagi sering gue repeat di itunes:
don't be a fool when love really don't love you.

this is the cue to let go, no matter how good he is on the paper,
because the dude doesn't want you, that's why.
prinsip gue sih, buat apa gue ngarep seseorang yang gak ngarepin gue.
ksian ah diri gue di sio sio, i gotta love myself more...

some people, including me, moves on easily,
gue naksir-dia gak naksir... yaudeh, santei aje.
lanjottt... next please...
gue gak akan nunggu lebih lama, to find out if he changes his mind,
atau berusaha lebih keras untuk bikin dia naksir sama gue.
but some of us might find it hard to just jump into the next episode,
yaudah dinikmati sendiri sendiri aje hehehe.

i'd say carrie is considered as one lucky person,
because the love turns out to love her back.
and for the rest of us, yang jalan idupnya gak tersedia di dvd manapun,
percaya aja, the universe will help, dan manusia itu kan memang ditakdirkan berpasangan.

love,
ris

Comments

danirachmat said…
jadi inget ama cerita pilem 'He's just not that in to you' Mba e.
cowok itu emang simple. Yes means yes and no means no.
dan kalo emang yang keluar adalah no, ya udah gitu aja ya. Ga usah drama banyak-banyak.
Hihihi. Suka ama postingan ini.
risti said…
tuh kannn! bener kan, admitted by a guy himself. laki emang simpel gak pake rempong. hihihi
Anonymous said…
baru bacaaaaaa... dan bacanya timingnya ga tepat.. pas abis ditelp sama orang-yang-gua-tungguin-hampir-3-tahun-ya-ampun-itu-kalo-jadi-anak-udah-segede-si-arka.. anyway, ini postingan kena banget ke gw tiii.. ibarat hati gue lagi luka, si postingan ini garemnya.. perihhhh..

But how do we know if the feeling's mutual?
To me, a man is actually an easy being.
a yes means yes. and a no means no.
kalo dia emang tertarik, he'll come for us.
he'll have some effort and he'll make make things happen.

funny thing is, i'm the one who always said that kind of stuff to my gf, sekarang oh lihatlah siapa yang kejebak omongannya sendiri..

suka bacanya, tapi sambil agak meringis mau nangis gitu..

i love this post, weceh2 jomblo, yang lagi nungguin mas2 tulang lunak yang ga jelas harus bca..

-abri-

risti said…
habriii!!! ini postingan udah lamaaa banget di draft. karna kalo aku belom kawin, kayanya aku pasti join kamu meringis pedih. tapi tenang aja neng, udah ditentuin kok jodohnya. tinggal lo nya mau nggak jalan kesana. ngomong2 garem, kita ngerujak jambu pake garem cabe kayanya enak yah
Secret Garden said…
setuju ti, easier krn mungkin kita udah kawin.. coba kita masih dalam rangka wara wiri cari jodooh.. hobi bgt gue nunggu tanpa arah..huhuhuhuh..

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